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Wacked-Out Weather

California has our weather.  And we have theirs.

I discovered this last night as I watched the Weather Channel on my newly "installed" cable (the landlord is re-wiring a few things, so the cable is hanging from the attic stairwell, draped across my bedroom floor and doorway and trails on into the living room to the TV a few feet from the door; lovely).  SoCal is getting pelted with rain and chilly temps (well, chilly for them — more like autumn weather for Nashville), while we bask in 80 degree-dry-sunny Southern California weather.

I don’t know if my friends are jealous that we’re "enjoying" such great weather in Tennessee as they limp through the rain-slicked streets and freeways of LA trying to avoid the many accidents such weather inevitably brings about while not becoming involved in one themselves and still getting to work a few hours before turning around and making the trek back. Angelenos really don’t take rain well. They tend to get rather freaked out. Maybe its the fear of mud slides taking out their back yard, or the fear of the "other drivers", who are always idiots and don’t know how to drive, that will pull over in front of their speeding car and cause them to hydroplane on the 405 transition road. Maybe its the fact that no one can ever remember what they did with their umbrella the last time it rained (months ago). Or perhaps its simply because every Angeleno knows you have to leave work and hour earlier whenever it rains in order to be at work on time — which is what I believe is the real cause of rainy-day gridlock, not the fender-benders and spin-outs. Whatever it is, LA is a mass-chaos of anxiety on rainy days. With over an inch downtown yesterday, I can well imagine the Paxil and Valium ingested. I’m sure those few who’ve taken note of the Indian Summer the South is experiencing are very unhappy that the weather patterns are backwards.

But I’ll tell ya, I’d trade them for our weather back any day now. I’m sick of summer. What happened to fall???

I had so much fun watching the leaves change and bundling up in sweaters last October. I was looking forward to it. Especially with all the lingering hot weather we had through September. But someone seems determined to deny me my autumn beauty.  And its driving me nuts!

Will someone please give Nashville its Autumn back.

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Moved

It took about 6 hours, one large truck, one small Toyota truck, two men and my sister, but we got everything moved into my new place Friday. YAY!!

I loooove my new home. It’s an amazing cottage/guest house on two acres surrounded by trees. The house is a lot bigger and more spacious than I’d thought, the exception being the storage. I have only one large walk in closet in which to put everything that had once occupied a small walk-in closet, a storage closet, a laundry closet and a small entry closet. Whew… that’s a lot of stuff. Thankfully there’s also a little attic space as well. But my closet is a little crowded.

All but two boxes are unpacked and two pictures have yet to be hung. Otherwise, all signs that I’ve not lived there before Friday are gone.

Nina was such a God-send!! She drove out late Thursday night/Friday morning and worked like a dog loading and unloading  my car twice and her pick-up once, cleaning my old place, hanging pictures in the new one, organizing my closet and re-organizing the kitchen. She helped me unpack boxes, throw out or give away stuff I no longer use or don’t really like, shopping for a vacuum and some small pieces of furniture, putting the furniture together and — most of all — she helped me get organized.

I think she should be on that show, "Clean Sweep". She’s be good on it. She can really crack the whip on cleaning out and throwing out, sorting and discarding and organizing. She really whipped my butt into shape. And that ain’t no easy task.

I have no internet or cable at the new place yet. So I’m at Panera having some chai, a pumkin muffin and a moment to breath before heading off to the grocery store — and perhaps Best Buy for a wireless router.

Thanks so much, everyone for the comments and good wishes for the move. All went peachy — but I’m pooped!! Cheers!

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Exhaustion, Frustration, Questions and Packing

I’ve been working like crazy, packing like crazy and getting things in order for my move this weekend to my new place. That’s why I haven’t posted — no time to write!!

I’m excited about getting moved, BUT I’m completely fed up/frustrated and pooped out by all the crap that goes with moving… namely, packing and arranging help to move. Pretty much everyone I’ve asked has either not been able to say because of their fluid schedules, committed and then back out because of previous but forgotten engagements, or not been able to help at all due to schedule conflicts.

I miss the days when all I had to do was tell my life group I needed help, and tell the worship team, and voila! I had an instant moving party. I’ve figured that I probably just don’t know people well enough here to really rate high enough in their lives to squeeze in a move for me. Not that I think people are free but just not coming; I don’t. I think everyone’s reasons are legitimate. But I had many years of history with my friends in LA, and consequently they always managed to come through for me when I needed them.

I’ve pretty much given up on the idea of getting it done with free labor/help and have booked Two Men and a Truck to come move the furniture on Friday. I feel much calmer and at peace now than I have the last week or so not knowing who, if anyone, was going to show up. Saturday I’ll move the smaller stuff that the professionals don’t — unless they have time (and I have the money) to move it all at once.  Which, come to think of it, would be awesome. I like the idea of having Saturday to unpack in a relaxed, non-rushed way.

All the craziness with trying to get a moving crew together caused me to really consider where I am right now and the kind of community I’ve chosen to plant myself in. — And yes, I choose the word plant, even though, as Larry points out, there’s a trend in the ministry world of moving away from the phrase "church plant" because it implies immobility, rootedness. More on that another time. — Am I in a place where people really understand and live out the phrase "doing life together", or am I in a place where it’s just another word for fellowship at appointed times?

I don’t really know. My heart and gut tell me its the former, not the latter. But another voice tickles me with the emerging situation of my move and tells me perhaps my heart is wrong. Which voice do I listen to? Which voice is right?

I don’t have answers. Only decisions. I choose to believe my heart.

Nashville is such a different culture than LA. And Nashville churches such different animals than Mosaic. I thought life was rather fluid at Mosaic. And, in truth, our services are very fluid. But life in general wasn’t so much. Here, with so many people in the music industry and not knowing from week to week, even day to day, what their schedule is going to be or where they will be working, life is incredibly fluid. It can be crazy-making. Especially for a mild control-freak like me. I like to know things, have things settled, in advance. Flexibility is fine, but at least give me a range, some boundaries, that the flexibility will be within. Does that sound crazy?

No matter how longingly I stare at my past, it will never change the place I’m in right now, or the places God desires me to go. I miss my home church. I miss my community. And yet, if I were to leave here, I’d miss People’s Church just as much — but for different reasons. I hope, perhaps, that the community I form here will be just as strong, just as durable and just as eternal as the one I have in LA. Even now, after being gone over a year, I know I’d be surrounded and loved on and plugged into service there as I ever was.

But I haven’t been at TCP long enough to expect that from the community around me. At least I don’t think so. People don’t really know me, don’t have a history with me yet. Community is based on relationships. And relationships are like a garden. They have to be tended to with great care. I’ve planted seeds and some small shoots of friendship have sprung up, but those tender shoots can’t hold too much.

At least that’s what I think. I don’t know… am I wrong about this? Am I not expecting enough from a community? Or am I expecting too much? Is Mosaic the exception or the rule?

I hope this post makes sense…. I’m too exhausted to proof it.

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We had Him before “hello”

Long before he laid down earth’s foundations, he had us in mind, had settled on us as the focus of his love, to be made whole and holy by his love. Long, long ago he decided to adopt us into his family through Jesus Christ. (What pleasure he took in planning this!) He wanted us to enter into the celebration of his lavish gift-giving by the hand of his beloved Son. — Paul (Ephesians 1:4-6, The Message)

Just a piece of what God’s been pouring into my heart lately… May you be richly blessed by Jesus today as you go about your life.

I can’t stop thanking God for you, my friends (and my readers)!! Every time I pray, I think of you and give thanks! But I do more than that. I ask. I ask Him, the God of our Master, Jesus Christ, the God of glory–to make you wise and discerning in knowing Him personally, growing closer to Him in intimate love, your eyes focused and clear, so that you can see exactly what it is He is calling you to do, grasp the immensity of this glorious way of life He has for all followers of Jesus, and the utter extravagance of his work in us who trust Him–endless energy, boundless strength! (based on Ephesians 1:16-19, The Message)

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Peter Pan Moments

I know I’ve been quiet here lately, but my life has been anything but the last few weeks. Work has been cuh-RAY-zee. I’ve been packing up to move into my new home in Forest Hills (don’t be too jealous; its a guest house and I’m renting… but still, it’s back into a home and out of the apartment crap).  And Randy and Jon Tyson have kept my mind reeling with good, deep contemplations and meditations (Wendy, Jon knows Mike Tafoya and started telling his story during his sermon; I kept thinking, "gosh, this sounds familiar! But there are a lot of people in New York…" Isn’t it wild how that whole 6-degrees thing keeps coming around; it really is a small world!).

I’ve started several posts, only to never publish them because I was just too dang tired and wrapped up in thoughts and God-conversations to finish them.

But now it’s time for this tired girl to rest and play.

I’m going to Disneyworld!!!!

Yep, I’m going to the Land of Magic —
for a full 5 days of Moments to remember and cherish forever — to celebrate my 40th birthday. I thought it was an appropriate place for a girl to renew her vow to never grow up, or, more accurately put, to never grow old. 

In commemoration of this event, I will ride Peter Pan; the experience that first introduced me to a magic beyond what my own imagination could create. Flying over the city of London aglow with city lights was a wonder of wonders to my little 3-year-old mind. I have delighted in the experience ever since. Perhaps it is even the reason I dreamed and yearned to visit London for so long. When my wish finally came through, God gave me a special kiss on the cheek.  Due to heavy delays at Heathrow, my plane was put in a holding pattern circling London. I looked out my window and there, between puffy clouds lay Peter Pan’s London, aglow in the December night. Amazing! I realized at that moment just how long I’d been waiting to see London; since I first rode Peter Pan at Disneyland when I was 3: 34 years.

Have you ever had a moment like that? A moment when, as if suddenly seeing Life for the first time, you realize a dream is coming true, unfolding like a fairy tale right before your very eyes?

When I look back — turning 40 has a way of causing you to reflect on all that’s gone before — and I take in the whole of my life, I see many such moments. Unfortunately, I was unaware of many of them. I was so caught up in the busy-ness of life and on always looking ahead, looking to the future and planning the "next big thing" in my life that I missed the dreams unfolding into reality right in front of me.

For years God has talked to me about taking the time to enjoy the ride of life He’s laid out for me. For years He has quietly, consistently pointed me in the direction of the turn-outs on the road, where I can stop a moment and catch a glimpse of the beauty and majesty of His amazing creation. For the last few years in particular He and I have wrestled and argued and struggled with the idea that, Life and the radical are experienced in the midst of the routine and mundane, the seemingly ordinary and every-day, contrary to everything my mind and heart have come to be convinced of.

What would life be like for us if we chose to live this way? To live as if everything we do, no matter how routine and ordinary, were the stuff magic is made of? The possible plane ride over London?

(I have so much more to say, but I’m falling asleep…)

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Have You Noticed…?

…that gas prices have dropped every day for the last week? I saw regular unleaded for $2.88 at a station on West End this morning on my way to work.

Makes me think the whole gas "shortage/crisis" and sudden huge rise in prices had less to do with reality and more to do with greed and "speculation".

I’m not one to ask for government regulation, but maybe it’s time to consider it when it comes to gas prices….

Just a thought.

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Southern Foods

My team had lunch today at Monell’s. Yum! It was a cool, family-style southern dinner complete with Turnip Greens, fried chicken, green beans, various salads and biscuits, among too many other dishes to remember. I loved the food (for the most part) and really enjoyed the setting and ambiance. I also enjoyed not having to stare at a menu and figure out what I wanted to eat today. Sometimes its nice to let someone else make the decisions. Since we weren’t a large group, we were eventually joined by a couple and a man with 4 young guys, which rounded out our large table quite well.

Having eaten collard greens last Thanksgiving, I thought I’d try the turnip greens. They can’t be that different, right? Well, yes… and no….

First, like collard greens, they look like cooked-to-death spinach, which I hate, so the greens were already down one. But the taste… well, that’ll kill ya. Kind of like eating spoiled spinach mixed with rancid milk poured over it (I’m just guessing. I’ve never actually eaten that).

My taste buds threw a fit and my throat nearly didn’t let the greens pass on account of the protestations of my stomach (based on the buds opinions of said greens). Surely my taste buds must be lying… so like a dork, I tried another bite.

Nope. They weren’t lying. How do people eat this stuff on a daily basis?? Fortunately, I hadn’t put more than a few bites-full on my plate. Perhaps if I spread the rest out like so, my pile would look not-so-much like a pile as it would a few scraps lying around, and I could just leave it and no one would notice….. It worked when I was a kid. Sometimes.

Before I could carry out my brilliant child-like plan, one of my co-workers, Eric, asked me how the meal was. Before I knew it I was talking about the greens. He actually laughed at my plight. Or perhaps he was laughing at my face, which now seemed permanently scrunched up in that, "ew, that’s so nasty-tastin’!" watery-eyes look. I’ve been told I make very funny faces. I choose to believe that’s what people are laughing at, and not because I just naturally look funny. Or because I have toilet paper stuck to my shoe.

Through his giggles, Eric told me that Vinegar would help the taste. I didn’t think anything could help, but after a time, I decided to try again. I’m not one to give up easily on local food. I like to be able to eat whatever everyone else eats. Part of my overseas mentality, I guess, coupled with the fact that my oldest siblings never gave me an opportunity to have food the way I liked it, so I had to eat whatever was available. Or starve. Old habits die hard.

Eric handed me the bottle of Vinegar (after first trying to pass off the fire-starter brand as a joke)  and, resisting temptation to pour the whole bloody thing over the two bites I had left, I splashed a few big drops onto the small pile of turnip greens (looking pathetically dark and, well, nasty) and mixed the two together with a fury usually saved for the hardest of cookie dough mixes.

I tentatively brought a small fork-full of the newly flavored greens to my mouth and, after pausing to inhale deeply (through my nose, of course) I took the greens-plunge again.

Not bad. Still not something I would eat just for the heck of it. But not nearly as bad as the first few bites.

By this time everyone at the table had heard of my struggle with the greens and turned to watch me as I ate. I found comrades in my greens struggle as several people at the table braved to cross the Southern norm and admit they, too, struggle with digestive rebellion when Greens are present.

It may take me a bit longer than I thought to acclimate to the Southern way of eating. I thought I had it pretty much down, having come from a family strong in the meat-and-3 tradition. But I forgot that there’s a whole genre a food that I’ve never encountered. Till now.

I still highly recommend Monell’s. But be forewarned. Eat the greens at your own risk.

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Welcome

So glad you came! As my friend Alex says, you belong here.

Take a look around, grab a drink from the frig, plop yourself down on that big fluffy couch and stay and chat with me a while. Tell me what’s on your mind. What’s exciting in your life? What really hacks you off right now? What’s God been teaching you lately?

Tell me your story. I wanna hear it. I know it’s good, because, well, just look at you. What depth and character you have. You don’t get that by accident. You aren’t born with it. It only comes by walking through dark places and living the real, gritty Life.

So talk to me. Tell me who you are. Let me see it in your words and in your passions. I want to know you.

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Too Busy for Words

Dang.

This week was crazy.
Next week promises to be more of the same. At least the early part.
I’ve been so busy I haven’t had time or brain cells available to write anything decent, even thought my brain is a veritable banquet of thoughts, ideas and opinions.

::sigh::

Sorry for the silent spaces. Perhaps this week will be better….

PS — new posts at my typepad Voice of Hope and Turning 40 blogs.

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What Do You See?

I got an email from my oldest sister, which sparked a debate between her and my brother. For his part, I’m very proud. He’s refuted every point in her emails (the first a copy of a letter Michael Moore, that egotistical, pompous fountain of misinformation and propaganda, wrote and mass-distributed) — very eloquently, calmly and considerately. I would not have responded so well. Which is why I chose not to respond at all.

I’m so sick of all the negativity and blame-gaming political crap going on now. Doesn’t anyone realize that while they are busy pointing fingers, people need help???? Don’t they realize that wasting their time on that right now won’t help anyone?

I saw a report on the local news about some shelters going up in both Williamson and Davidson counties for the expected evacuees from the Gulf Coast, and how people all over Middle Tennessee are reaching out and giving of themselves to help those affected by Hurricane Katrina. No company contacted by the new shelters said no to anything they requested.

I think it really comes down to this: What do you see? Do you see only the negative, or can you open your eyes, and your heart and mind, to the positive? To the lives being saved, the people who are alive and grateful for it, to the amazing response of the American Public.

That is what I find most redeeming and humbling; the response of Americans all over the country, donating money and supplies, volunteering their time to serve those affected by this natural disaster through clean-up, medical, social, economic and spiritual help. Those offering their own homes, opening their doors and offering hospitality to their fellow Americans. Isn’t that amazing? Isn’t that worth celebrating, worth announcing across the news?

If you feel so strongly that someone must be blamed for what happened, and so compelled to be the one pointing the finger of blame, please, for the sake of all who are suffering, please wait. Wait till the cities of the gulf coast are in better condition, till the clean up in well on its way, till all those displaced by this natural disaster have found places to live other than a shelter, and are well on their way to rebuilding their lives. Wait that long.

Please. Wait. Let this be their time. Let this be about them. Give honor and deference to those who suffered most from all this.

Then, if you feel you must, go back to your political games of pointing fingers of blame.

But until then, please put your personal political agendas aside and help those who’ve lost so much.

    Love must be sincere… Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves… Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with God’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.
    Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. Live in harmony with one another. — Romans 12:9-16