In "When Harry Met Sally…" there is a scene where Sally calls Harry sobbing, so he rushes over to her apartment to see what horrible disaster has befallen his friend. Turns out her ex-boyfriend is getting married, and the news has had an unexpectedly painful effect on Sally. When Harry asks her, "If you could have him back today and he asked you to marry him, would you want him?"

Sally responds quickly and vehemently, "NO!!"

This leaves poor Harry absolutely flummoxed as to what the problem is. You poor men! There is no way for you to ever comprehend how a woman’s mind and heart work — and how they work in tandem, tag-teaming to drive us nearly insane with a bizarre combination of logic and emotion, that ultimately winds up distorting all reality and yet at the same time getting it so keenly on the mark.

Sally uncovers for us the real reason for her tears. "I thought he didn’t want to get married. But the truth is, he didn’t want to marry me. He didn’t love me."

I’m in a Sally moment. Of sorts. There are things I’ve realized I don’t want, situations and people I don’t want to commit to. But, like Sally, now that they are moving on and making commitments with others, my ego is taking a hit. My ego hurts. And it’s crying out in Sally-like pain, "No?! I don’t want them… I wouldn’t commit to that if they asked… but…. they didn’t ask. They aren’t asking. They don’t want me.

Ouch.

I know God has His hand in all this. I know Him. If this these things were His desire for me, the situations would be much different. He has a way of making things come together, even when we’re not sure it can, or should… or if we want it to….

But, dang. My ego hurts! I want people to want me. I want people to think I’m the greatest thing since sliced bread. And when they don’t — for whatever reason — I feel like I’ve failed.

I’m learning to fight those thoughts with God’s Truth about me. I’m not a failure when people don’t see my wonderfulness. I’m just not the kind of wonderfulness they need — or deserve (so says the snarky voice in my heart). But knowing these things, fighting the failure-feeling with these Truths, doesn’t take the sting out of rejection.